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"This is the example. There was during my lifetime in the town of
Madaura, the birthplace of the philosopher Apuleius, a witch who was able to
attract men to her chamber by burning a few of their hairs along with certain
herbs upon her tripod, pronouncing at the same time certain words. Now one day
when she wished by this means to gain the, love of a young man, she was
deceived by her maid, and instead of the young man's hairs, she burned some
hairs pulled from a leather bottle, made out of a goatskin that hung in a
tavern. During the night the leather bottle, full of wine, capered through the
town up to the witch's door. This fact is undoubted. And in sacraments as in
enchantments it is the form which operates. The effect of a divine formula
cannot be less in power and extent than the effect of an infernal
formula."
Having spoken in this fashion the great St. Augustine sat down amidst applause.
One of the blessed, of an advanced age and having a melancholy appearance,
asked permission to speak. No one knew him. His name was Probus, and he was not
enrolled in the canon of the saints.
"I beg the company's pardon," said he, "I have no halo, and I
gained eternal blessedness without any eminent distinction. But after what the
great St. Augustine has just told you I believe it right to impart a cruel
experience, which I had, relative to the conditions necessary for the validity
of a sacrament. The bishop of Hippo is indeed right in what he said. A
sacrament depends on the form; its virtue is in its form; its vice is in its
form. Listen, confessors and pontiffs, to my woeful story. I was a priest in
Rome under the rule of the Emperor Gordianus. Without desiring to recommend
myself to you for any special merit, I may say that I exercised my priesthood
with piety and zeal. For forty years I served the church of St.
Modestus-beyond-the-Walls. My habits were regular. Every Saturday I went to a
tavern-keeper called Barjas, who dwelt with his wine-jars under the Porta
Capena, and from him I bought the wine that I consecrated daily throughout the
week. During that.long space of time I never failed for a single morning to
consecrate the holy sacrifice of the mass. However, I had no joy, and it was
with a heart oppressed by sorrow that, on the steps of the altar I used to ask,
'Why art thou so heavy, O my soul, and why art thou so disquieted within me?'
The faithful whom I invited to the holy table gave me cause for affliction, for
having, so to speak, the Host that I administered still upon their tongues,
they fell again into sin just as if the sacrament had been without power or
efficacy. At last I reached the end of my earthly trials, and failing asleep in
the Lord, I awoke in this abode of the elect. I learned then from the mouth of
the angel who brought me here, that Barjas, the tavern-keeper of the Porta
Capena, had sold for wine a decoction of roots and barks in which there was not
a single drop of the juice of the grape. I had been unable to transmute this
vile brew into blood, for it was not wine, and wine alone is changed into the
blood of Jesus Christ. Therefore all my consecrations were invalid, and unknown
to us, my faithful and myself had for forty years been deprived of the
sacrament and were in fact in a state of excommunication. This revelation threw
me into a stupor which overwhelms me even to-day in this abode of bliss. I go
all through Paradise without ever meeting a single one of those Christians whom
formerly I admitted to the holy table in the basilica of the blessed Modestus.
Deprived of the bread of angels, they easily gave way to the most abominable
vices, and they have all gone to hell. It gives me some satisfaction to think
that Barjas, the tavern-keeper, is damned. There is in these things a logic
worthy of the author of all logic. Nevertheless my unhappy example proves that
it is sometimes inconvenient that form should prevail over essence in the
sacraments, and I humbly ask, Could not, eternal wisdom remedy this?"
"No," answered the Lord. "The remedy would be worse than the
disease. It would be the ruin of the priesthood if essence prevailed over form
in the laws of salvation."
"Alas! Lord," sighed the humble Probus. "Be persuaded by my
humble experience; as long as you reduce your sacraments to formulas your
justice will meet with terrible obstacles."
"I know that better than you do," replied the Lord. "I see in
a single glance both the actual problems which are difficult, and the future
problems which will not be less difficult. Thus I can foretell that when the
sun will have turned round the earth two hundred and forty times more.
"Sublime language," exclaimed the angels.
"And worthy of the creator of the world," answered the pontiffs.
"It is," resumed the Lord, "a manner of speaking in
accordance with my old cosmogony and one which I cannot give up without losing
my immutability. . . .
"After the sun, then, will have turned another two hundred and forty
times round the earth, there will not be a single cleric left in Rome who knows
Latin. When they sing their litanies in the churches people will invoke
Orichel, Roguel, and Totichel, and, as you know, these are devils and not
angels. Many robbers desiring to make their communions, but fearing that before
obtaining pardon they would be forced to give up the things they had robbed to
the Church, will make their confessions to travelling priests,who, ignorant of
both Italian and Latin, and only speaking the patois of their village, will go
through cities and towns selling the remission of sins for a base price, often
for a bottle of wine. Probably we shall not be inconvenienced by those
absolutions as they will want contrition to make them valid, but it may be that
their baptisms will cause us some embarrassment. The priests will become so
ignorant that they will baptize children in nomine patria et filia et spirita
sancta, as Louis de Potter will take a pleasure in relating in the third volume
of his 'Philosophical, Political, and Critical History of Christianity.' It
will be an arduous question to decide on the validity of such baptisms; for
even if in my sacred writings I tolerate a Greek less elegant than Plato's and
a scarcely Ciceronian Latin, I cannot possibly admit a piece of pure patois as
a liturgical formula. And one shudders when one thinks that millions of
new-born babes will be baptized by this method. But let us return to our
penguins."
"Your divine words, Lord, have already led us back to them," said
St. Gal. "In the signs of religion and the laws of salvation form
necessarily prevails over essence, and the validity of a sacrament solely
depends upon its form. The whole question is whether the penguins have been
baptized with the proper forms. Now there is no doubt about the answer."
The fathers and the doctors agreed, and their perplexity became only the
more cruel.
"The Christian state," said St. Cornelius, "is not without
serious inconveniences for a penguin. In it the birds are obliged to work out
their own salvation. How can they succeed? The habits of birds are, in many
points, contrary to the commandments of the Church, and the penguins have no
reason for changing theirs. I mean that they are not intelligent enough to give
up their present habits and assume better."
"They cannot," said the Lord; "my decrees prevent them."
"Nevertheless," resumed St. Cornelius, "in virtue of their
baptism their actions no longer remain indifferent. Henceforth they will be
good or bad, susceptible of merit or of demerit."
"That is precisely the question we have to deal with," said the
Lord.
"I see only one solution," said St. Augustine. "The penguins
will go to hell."
"But they have no soul," observed St. Irenaeus.
"It is a pity"" sighed Tertullian.
"It is indeed," resumed St. Gal. "And I admit that my
disciple, the holy Mael, has, in his blind zeal, created great theological
difficulties for the Holy Spirit and introduced disorder into the economy of
mysteries."
"He is an old blunderer," cried St. Adjutor of Alsace, shrugging
his shoulders.
But the Lord cast a reproachful look on Adjutor.
"Allow me to speak," said he; "the holy Mael has not
intuitive knowledge like you, my blessed ones. He does not see me. He is an old
man burdened by infirmities; he is half deaf and three parts blind. You are too
severe on him. However, I recognise that the situation is an embarrassing
one."
"Luckily it is but a passing disorder," said St. Irenaeus.
"The penguins are baptized, but their eggs are not, and the evil will stop
with the present generation."
"Do not speak thus, Irenaeus my son," said the Lord. "There
are exceptions to the laws that men of science lay down on the earth because
they are imperfect and have not an exact application to nature. But the laws
that I establish are perfect and suffer no exception. We must decide the fate
of the baptized penguins without violating any divine law, and in a manner
conformable to the decalogue as well as to the commandments of my Church."
"Lord," said St. Gregory Nazianzen, "give them an immortal
soul."
"Alas! Lord, what would they do with it," sighed Lactantius.
"They have not tuneful voices to sing your praises. They would not be able
to celebrate your mysteries."
"Without doubt," said St. Augustine, "they would not observe
the divine law."
"They could not," said the Lord.
"They could not," continued St. Augustine. "And if, Lord, in
your wisdom, you pour an immortal soul into them, they will burn eternally in
hell in virtue of your adorable decrees. Thus will the transcendent order, that
this old Welshman has disturbed, be re-established."
"You propose a correct solution to me, son of Monica," said the
Lord, "and one that accords with my wisdom. But it does not satisfy my
mercy. And, although in my essence I am immutable, the longer I endure, the
more I incline to mildness. This change of character is evident to anyone who
reads my two Testaments."
As the discussion continued without much light being thrown upon the matter
and as the blessed showed a disposition to keep repeating the same thing, it
was decided to consult St. Catherine of Alexandria. This is what was usually
done in such cases. St. Catherine while on earth had confounded fifty very
learned doctors. She knew Plato's philosophy in addition to the Holy
Scriptures, and she also possessed a knowledge of rhetoric.
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