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CHAPTER
28
Soon after this, the general found himself obliged to go to London
for a week; and he left Northanger earnestly regretting that any necessity
should rob him even for an hour of Miss Morland's
company, and anxiously recommending the study of her comfort and amusement to
his children as their chief object in his absence. His departure gave Catherine
the first experimental conviction that a loss may be sometimes a gain. The
happiness with which their time now passed, every employment voluntary, every
laugh indulged, every meal a scene of ease and good humour,
walking where they liked and when they liked, their hours, pleasures, and
fatigues at their own command, made her thoroughly sensible of the restraint
which the general's presence had imposed, and most thankfully feel their
present release from it. Such ease and such delights made her love the place
and the people more and more every day; and had it not been for a dread of its
soon becoming expedient to leave the one, and an apprehension of not being
equally beloved by the other, she would at each moment of each day have been
perfectly happy; but she was now in the fourth week of her visit; before the
general came home, the fourth week would be turned, and perhaps it might seem
an intrusion if she stayed much longer. This was a painful consideration
whenever it occurred; and eager to get rid of such a weight on her mind, she
very soon resolved to speak to Eleanor about it at once, propose going away,
and be guided in her conduct by the manner in which her proposal might be
taken.
Aware that if she gave herself much time, she might feel it difficult to
bring forward so unpleasant a subject, she took the first opportunity of being
suddenly alone with Eleanor, and of Eleanor's being in the middle of a speech
about something very different, to start forth her obligation of going away
very soon. Eleanor looked and declared herself much concerned. She had
"hoped for the pleasure of her company for a much longer time--had been
misled (perhaps by her wishes) to suppose that a much longer visit had been
promised--and could not but think that if Mr. and Mrs. Morland
were aware of the pleasure it was to her to have her there, they would be too
generous to hasten her return." Catherine explained: "Oh! As to that,
Papa and Mamma were in no hurry at all. As long as she was happy, they would
always be satisfied."
"Then why, might she ask, in such a hurry herself to leave them?"
"Oh! Because she had been there so long."
"Nay, if you can use such a word, I can urge you no farther. If you
think it long--"
"Oh! No, I do not indeed. For my own pleasure, I could stay with you as
long again." And it was directly settled that, till she had, her leaving
them was not even to be thought of. In having this cause of uneasiness so
pleasantly removed, the force of the other was likewise weakened. The kindness,
the earnestness of Eleanor's manner in pressing her to stay, and Henry's
gratified look on being told that her stay was determined, were such sweet
proofs of her importance with them, as left her only just so much solicitude as
the human mind can never do comfortably without. She did--almost
always--believe that Henry loved her, and quite always that his father and
sister loved and even wished her to belong to them; and believing so far, her
doubts and anxieties were merely sportive irritations.
Henry was not able to obey his father's injunction of remaining wholly at
Northanger in attendance on the ladies, during his absence in London, the
engagements of his curate at Woodston obliging him to
leave them on Saturday for a couple of nights. His loss was not now what it had
been while the general was at home; it lessened their gaiety, but did not ruin
their comfort; and the two girls agreeing in occupation, and improving in
intimacy, found themselves so well sufficient for the time to themselves, that
it was eleven o'clock, rather a late hour at the abbey, before they quitted the
supper-room on the day of Henry's departure. They had just reached the head of
the stairs when it seemed, as far as the thickness of the walls would allow
them to judge, that a carriage was driving up to the door, and the next moment
confirmed the idea by the loud noise of the house-bell. After
the first perturbation of surprise had passed away, in a "Good heaven!
What can be the matter?" it was quickly decided by Eleanor to be her
eldest brother, whose arrival was often as sudden, if not quite so
unseasonable, and accordingly she hurried down to welcome him.
Catherine walked on to her chamber, making up her mind as well as she could,
to a further acquaintance with Captain Tilney, and
comforting herself under the unpleasant impression his conduct had given her,
and the persuasion of his being by far too fine a gentleman to approve of her,
that at least they should not meet under such circumstances as would make their
meeting materially painful. She trusted he would never speak of Miss Thorpe;
and indeed, as he must by this time be ashamed of the part he had acted, there
could be no danger of it; and as long as all mention of Bath
scenes were avoided, she thought she could behave to him very civilly. In such
considerations time passed away, and it was certainly in his favour that Eleanor should be so glad to see him, and have
so much to say, for half an hour was almost gone since his arrival, and Eleanor
did not come up.
At that moment Catherine thought she heard her step in the gallery, and
listened for its continuance; but all was silent. Scarcely, however, had she
convicted her fancy of error, when the noise of something moving close to her
door made her start; it seemed as if someone was touching the very doorway--and
in another moment a slight motion of the lock proved that some hand must be on
it. She trembled a little at the idea of anyone's approaching so cautiously;
but resolving not to be again overcome by trivial appearances of alarm, or
misled by a raised imagination, she stepped quietly forward, and opened the
door. Eleanor, and only Eleanor, stood there. Catherine's spirits, however,
were tranquillized but for an instant, for Eleanor's cheeks were pale, and her manner greatly agitated. Though evidently
intending to come in, it seemed an effort to enter the room, and a still
greater to speak when there. Catherine, supposing some uneasiness on Captain Tilney's account, could only express her concern by silent
attention, obliged her to be seated, rubbed her temples with lavender-water,
and hung over her with affectionate solicitude. "My dear Catherine, you
must not--you must not indeed--" were Eleanor's first connected words.
"I am quite well. This kindness distracts me--I cannot bear it--I come to
you on such an errand!"
"Errand! To me!"
"How shall I tell you! Oh! How shall I tell you!"
A new idea now darted into Catherine's mind, and turning
as pale as her friend, she exclaimed, "'Tis a
messenger from Woodston!"
"You are mistaken, indeed," returned Eleanor, looking at her most
compassionately; "it is no one from Woodston. It
is my father himself." Her voice faltered, and her eyes were turned to the
ground as she mentioned his name. His unlooked-for return was enough in itself
to make Catherine's heart sink, and for a few moments she hardly supposed there
were anything worse to be told. She said nothing; and Eleanor, endeavouring to collect herself and speak with firmness,
but with eyes still cast down, soon went on. "You are too good, I am sure, to think the worse of me for the part I am obliged to
perform. I am indeed a most unwilling messenger. After what has so lately
passed, so lately been settled between us--how joyfully, how thankfully on my
side!--as to your continuing here as I hoped for many, many weeks longer, how
can I tell you that your kindness is not to be accepted--and that the happiness
your company has hitherto given us is to be repaid by-- But I must not trust
myself with words. My dear Catherine, we are to part. My father has recollected
an engagement that takes our whole family away on Monday. We are going to Lord Longtown's, near Hereford,
for a fortnight. Explanation and apology are equally impossible. I cannot
attempt either."
"My dear Eleanor," cried Catherine, suppressing her feelings as
well as she could, "do not be so distressed. A second engagement must give
way to a first. I am very, very sorry we are to part--so soon, and so suddenly
too; but I am not offended, indeed I am not. I can finish my visit here, you
know, at any time; or I hope you will come to me. Can you, when you return from
this lord's, come to Fullerton?"
"It will not be in my power, Catherine."
"Come when you can, then."
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