`It won't happen,' said Dukes. `Our old show will come flop; our
civilization is going to fall. It's going down the bottomless pit, down the
chasm. And believe me, the only bridge across the chasm will be the phallus!'
`Oh do! do be impossible, General!' cried Olive.
`I believe our civilization is going to collapse,' said Aunt Eva.
`And what will come after it?' asked Clifford.
`I haven't the faintest idea, but something, I suppose,' said the elderly
lady.
`Connie says people like wisps of smoke, and Olive says immunized women, and
babies in bottles, and Dukes says the phallus is the bridge to what comes next.
I wonder what it will really be?' said Clifford.
`Oh, don't bother! let's get on with today,' said Olive. `Only hurry up with
the breeding bottle, and let us poor women off.'
`There might even be real men, in the next phase,' said Tommy. `Real,
intelligent, wholesome men, and wholesome nice women! Wouldn't that be a
change, an enormous change from us? We're not men, and the women aren't
women. We're only cerebrating make-shifts, mechanical and intellectual
experiments. There may even come a civilization of genuine men and women,
instead of our little lot of clever-jacks, all at the intelligence-age of
seven. It would be even more amazing than men of smoke or babies in bottles.'
`Oh, when people begin to talk about real women, I give up,' said Olive.
`Certainly nothing but the spirit in us is worth having,' said Winterslow.
`Spirits!' said Jack, drinking his whisky and soda.
`Think so? Give me the resurrection of the body!' said Dukes.
`But it'll come, in time, when we've shoved the cerebral stone away a bit,
the money and the rest. Then we'll get a democracy of touch, instead of a
democracy of pocket.'
Something echoed inside Connie: `Give me the democracy of touch, the
resurrection of the body!' She didn't at all know what it meant, but it
comforted her, as meaningless things may do.
Anyhow everything was terribly silly, and she was exasperatedly bored by it
all, by Clifford, by Aunt Eva, by Olive and Jack, and Winterslow, and even by
Dukes. Talk, talk, talk! What hell it was, the continual rattle of it!
Then, when all the people went, it was no better. She continued plodding on,
but exasperation and irritation had got hold of her lower body, she couldn't
escape. The days seemed to grind by, with curious painfulness, yet nothing
happened. Only she was getting thinner; even the housekeeper noticed it, and
asked her about herself Even Tommy Dukes insisted she was not well, though she
said she was all right. Only she began to be afraid of the ghastly white
tombstones, that peculiar loathsome whiteness of Carrara marble, detestable as
false teeth, which stuck up on the hillside, under Tevershall church, and which
she saw with such grim painfulness from the park. The bristling of the hideous
false teeth of tombstones on the hill affected her with a grisly kind of
horror. She felt the time not far off when she would be buried there, added to
the ghastly host under the tombstones and the monuments, in these filthy
Midlands.
She needed help, and she knew it: so she wrote a little cri du coeur
to her sister, Hilda. `I'm not well lately, and I don't know what's the matter
with me.'
Down posted Hilda from Scotland, where she had taken up her abode. She came
in March, alone, driving herself in a nimble two-seater. Up the drive she came,
tooting up the incline, then sweeping round the oval of grass, where the two
great wild beech-trees stood, on the flat in front of the house.
Connie had run out to the steps. Hilda pulled up her car, got out, and
kissed her sister.
`But Connie!' she cried. `Whatever is the matter?'
`Nothing!' said Connie, rather shamefacedly; but she knew how she had
suffered in contrast to Hilda. Both sisters had the same rather golden, glowing
skin, and soft brown hair, and naturally strong, warm physique. But now Connie
was thin and earthy-looking, with a scraggy, yellowish neck, that stuck out of
her jumper.
`But you're ill, child!' said Hilda, in the soft, rather breathless voice
that both sisters had alike. Hilda was nearly, but not quite, two years older
than Connie.
`No, not ill. Perhaps I'm bored,' said Connie a little pathetically.
The light of battle glowed in Hilda's face; she was a woman, soft and still
as she seemed, of the old amazon sort, not made to fit with men.
`This wretched place!' she said softly, looking at poor, old, lumbering
Wragby with real hate. She looked soft and warm herself, as a ripe pear, and
she was an amazon of the real old breed.
She went quietly in to Clifford. He thought how handsome she looked, but
also he shrank from her. His wife's family did not have his sort of manners, or
his sort of etiquette. He considered them rather outsiders, but once they got
inside they made him jump through the hoop.
He sat square and well-groomed in his chair, his hair sleek and blond, and
his face fresh, his blue eyes pale, and a little prominent, his expression
inscrutable, but well-bred. Hilda thought it sulky and stupid, and he waited.
He had an air of aplomb, but Hilda didn't care what he had an air of; she was
up in arms, and if he'd been Pope or Emperor it would have been just the same.
`Connie's looking awfully unwell,' she said in her soft voice, fixing him
with her beautiful, glowering grey eyes. She looked so maidenly, so did Connie;
but he well knew the tone of Scottish obstinacy underneath.
`She's a little thinner,' he said.
`Haven't you done anything about it?'
`Do you think it necessary?' he asked, with his suavest English stiffness,
for the two things often go together.
Hilda only glowered at him without replying; repartee was not her forte, nor
Connie's; so she glowered, and he was much more uncomfortable than if she had
said things.
`I'll take her to a doctor,' said Hilda at length. `Can you suggest a good
one round here?'
`I'm afraid I can't.'
`Then I'll take her to London, where we have a doctor we trust.'
Though boiling with rage, Clifford said nothing.
`I suppose I may as well stay the night,' said Hilda, pulling off her
gloves, `and I'll drive her to town tomorrow.'
Clifford was yellow at the gills with anger, and at evening the whites of
his eyes were a little yellow too. He ran to liver. But Hilda was consistently
modest and maidenly.
`You must have a nurse or somebody, to look after you personally. You should
really have a manservant,' said Hilda as they sat, with apparent calmness, at
coffee after dinner. She spoke in her soft, seemingly gentle way, but Clifford
felt she was hitting him on the head with a bludgeon.
`You think so?' he said coldly.
`I'm sure! It's necessary. Either that, or Father and I must take Connie
away for some months. This can't go on.'
`What can't go on?'
`Haven't you looked at the child!' asked Hilda, gazing at him full stare. He
looked rather like a huge, boiled crayfish at the moment; or so she thought.
`Connie and I will discuss it,' he said.
`I've already discussed it with her,' said Hilda.
Clifford had been long enough in the hands of nurses; he hated them, because
they left him no real privacy. And a manservant!...he couldn't stand a man
hanging round him. Almost better any woman. But why not Connie?
The two sisters drove off in the morning, Connie looking rather like an
Easter lamb, rather small beside Hilda, who held the wheel. Sir Malcolm was
away, but the Kensington house was open.
The doctor examined Connie carefully, and asked her all about her life. `I
see your photograph, and Sir Clifford's, in the illustrated papers sometimes.
Almost notorieties, aren't you? That's how the quiet little girls grow up,
though you're only a quiet little girl even now, in spite of the illustrated
papers. No, no! There's nothing organically wrong, but it won't do! It won't
do! Tell Sir Clifford he's got to bring you to town, or take you abroad, and
amuse you. You've got to be amused, got to! Your vitality is much too low; no
reserves, no reserves. The nerves of the heart a bit queer already: oh, yes!
Nothing but nerves; I'd put you right in a month at Cannes or Biarritz. But it
mustn't go on, mustn't, I tell you, or I won't be answerable for
consequences. You're spending your life without renewing it. You've got to be
amused, properly, healthily amused. You're spending your vitality without
making any. Can't go on, you know. Depression! Avoid depression!'
Hilda set her jaw, and that meant something.
Michaelis heard they were in town, and came running with roses. `Why,
whatever's wrong?' he cried. `You're a shadow of yourself. Why, I never saw
such a change! Why ever didn't you let me know? Come to Nice with me! Come down
to Sicily! Go on, come to Sicily with me. It's lovely there just now. You want
sun! You want life! Why, you're wasting away! Come away with me! Come to
Africa! Oh, hang Sir Clifford! Chuck him, and come along with me. I'll marry
you the minute he divorces you. Come along and try a life! God's love! That
place Wragby would kill anybody. Beastly place! Foul place! Kill anybody! Come
away with me into the sun! It's the sun you want, of course, and a bit of
normal life.'
But Connie's heart simply stood still at the thought of abandoning Clifford
there and then. She couldn't do it. No...no! She just couldn't. She had to go
back to Wragby.
Michaelis was disgusted. Hilda didn't like Michaelis, but she almost
preferred him to Clifford. Back went the sisters to the Midlands.
Hilda talked to Clifford, who still had yellow eyeballs when they got back.
He, too, in his way, was overwrought; but he had to listen to all Hilda said,
to all the doctor had said, not what Michaelis had said, of course, and he sat
mum through the ultimatum.
`Here is the address of a good manservant, who was with an invalid patient
of the doctor's till he died last month. He is really a good man, and fairly
sure to come.'
`But I'm not an invalid, and I will not have a manservant,'
said Clifford, poor devil.
`And here are the addresses of two women; I saw one of them, she would do
very well; a woman of about fifty, quiet, strong, kind, and in her way
cultured...'
Clifford only sulked, and would not answer.
`Very well, Clifford. If we don't settle something by to-morrow, I shall
telegraph to Father, and we shall take Connie away.'
`Will Connie go?' asked Clifford.
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