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Then
the Jew put out his hand and gave Khalifah the fisherman a dinar, saying,
"Take this for thyself, O Khalifah, and spend it on thy family." When
Khalifah saw the dinar on his palm, he took it, saying, "Laud to the Lord
of Dominion!" as if he had never seen aught of gold in his life, and went
somewhat away. But before he had gone far, he was minded of the ape's charge
and turning back, threw down the ducat, saying: "Take thy gold and give
folk back their fish! Dost thou make a laughingstock of folk?" The Jew,
hearing this, thought he was jesting, and offered him two dinars upon the
other, but Khalifah said: "Give me the fish, and no nonsense. How knewest
thou I would sell it at this price?" Whereupon the Jew gave him two more
dinars and said, "Take these five ducats for thy fish and leave
greed." So Khalifah hent the five dinars in hand and went away, rejoicing,
and gazing and marveling at the gold and saying: "Glory be to God! There
is not with the Caliph of Baghdad what is with me this day!"
Then
he ceased not faring on till he came to the end of the market street, when he
remembered the words of the ape and his charge, and returning to the Jew, threw
him back the gold. Quoth he: "What aileth thee, O Khalifah? Dost thou want
silver in exchange for gold?" Khalifah replied: "I want nor dirhams
nor dinars. I only want thee to give me back folk's fish." With this the
Jew waxed wroth and shouted out at him, saying: "O Fisherman, thou
bringest me a fish not worth a sequin and I give thee five for it, yet art thou
not content! Art thou Jinn-mad? Tell me for how much thou wilt sell it."
Answered Khalifah, "I will not sell it for silver nor for gold, only for
two sayings thou shalt say me."
When
the Jew heard speak of the "two sayings," his eyes sank into his
head, he breathed hard and ground his teeth for rage, and said to him, "O
nail paring of the Moslems, wilt thou have me throw off my faith for the sake
of thy fish, and wilt thou debauch me from my religion and stultify my belief
and my conviction which I inherited of old from my forebears?" Then he
cried out to the servants who were in waiting and said: "Out on you! Bash
me this unlucky rogue's neck and bastinado him soundly!" So they came down
upon him with blows and ceased not beating him till he fell beneath the shop,
and the Jew said to them, "Leave him and let him rise." Whereupon
Khalifah jumped up as if naught ailed him, and the Jew said to him: "Tell
me what price thou asketh for this fish and I will give it thee; for thou hast
gotten but scant good of us this day." Answered the fisherman, "Have
no fear for me, O master, because of the beating, for I can eat ten donkeys' rations
of stick."
The
Jew laughed at his words and said, "Allah upon thee, tell me what thou
wilt have and by the right of my faith, I will give it thee!" The
fisherman replied, "Naught from thee will remunerate me for this fish save
the two words whereof I spake." And the Jew said, "Meseemeth thou
wouldst have me become a Moslem." Khalifah rejoined: "By Allah, O
Jew, an thou Islamize, 'twill nor advantage the Moslems nor damage the Jews.
And in like manner, an thou hold to thy misbelief 'twill nor damage the Moslems
nor advantage the Jews. But what I desire of thee is that thou rise to thy feet
and say: 'Bear witness against me, O people of the market, that I barter my ape
for the ape of Khalifah the fisherman and my lot in the world for his lot and
my luck for his luck'." Quoth the Jew, "If this be all thou desirest,
'twill sit lightly upon me." So he rose without stay or delay and standing
on his feet, repeated the required words. After which he turned to the
fisherman and asked him, "Hast thou aught else to ask of me?" "No,"
answered he, and the Jew said, "Go in peace!"
Hearing
this Khalifah sprung to his feet forthright, took up his basket and net, and
returned straight to the Tigris, where he threw his net and pulled it in. He
found it heavy and brought it not ashore but with travail, when he found it
full of fish of all kinds. Presently up came a woman with a dish, who gave him
a dinar, and he gave her fish for it, and after her a eunuch, who also bought a
dinar's worth of fish, and so forth till he had sold ten dinars' worth. And he
continued to sell ten dinars' worth of fish daily for ten days, till he had
gotten a hundred dinars.
Now
Khalifah the fisherman had quarters in the Passage of the Merchants, and as he
lay one night in his lodging much bemused with hashish, he said to himself:
"O Khalifah, the folk all know thee for a poor fisherman, and now thou
hast gotten a hundred golden dinars. Needs must the Commander of the Faithful,
Harun al-Rashid, hear of this from someone, and haply he will be wanting money
and will send for thee and say to thee: 'I need a sum of money and it hath
reached me that thou hast an hundred dinars, so do thou lend them to me those
same.' I shall answer, 'O Commander of the Faithful, I am a poor man, and whoso
told thee that I had a hundred dinars lied against me, for I have naught of
this.' Thereupon be will commit me to the Chief of Police, saying, 'Strip him
of his clothes and torment him with the bastinado till he confess and give up
the hundred dinars in his possession.' Wherefore, meseemeth to provide against
this predicament, the best thing I can do is to rise forthright and bash myself
with the whip, so to use myself to beating." And his hashish said to him,
"Rise, doff thy dress."
So
he stood up, and putting off his clothes, took a whip he had by him and set
handy a leather pillow. Then he fell to lashing himself, laying every other
blow upon the pillow and roaring out the while-: "Alas! Alas! By Allah,
'tis a false saying, O my lord, and they have lied against me, for I am a poor fisherman
and have naught of the goods of the world!" The noise of the whip falling
on the pillow and on his person resounded in the still of night and the folk
heard it, and amongst others the merchants, and they said: "Whatever can
ail the poor fellow, that he crieth and we hear the noise of blows falling on
him? 'Twould seem robbers have broken in upon him and are tormenting him."
Presently they all came forth of their lodgings at. the noise of the blows and
the crying, and repaired to Khalifah's room, but they found the door locked and
said one to other: "Belike the robbers have come in upon him from the back
of the adjoining saloon. It behooveth us to climb over by the roofs."
So
they clomb over the roofs, and coming down through the skylight, saw him naked
and flogging himself, and asked him, "What aileth thee, O Khalifah?"
He answered: "Know, O folk, that I have gained some dinars and fear lest
my case be carried up to the Prince of True Believers, Harun al-Rashid, and he
send for me and demand of me those same gold pieces; whereupon I should deny,
and I fear that if I deny, he will torture me, so I am torturing myself, by way
of accustoming me to what may come." The merchants laughed at him and
said: "Leave this fooling. May Allah not bless thee and the dinars thou
hast gotten! Verily thou hast disturbed us this night and hast troubled our
hearts."
So
Khalifah left flogging himself and slept till the morning, when he rose and
would have gone about his business, but bethought him of his hundred dinars and
said in his mind: "An I leave them at home, thieves will steal them, and
if I put them in a belt about my waist, peradventure someone will see me and
lay in wait for me till he come upon me in some lonely place and slay me and
take the money. But I have a device that should serve me well, right
well." So he jumped up forthright and made him a pocket in the collar of
his gabardine, and tying the hundred dinars up in a purse, laid them in the
collar pocket. Then he took his net and basket and staff and went down to the
Tigris, where he made a cast, but brought up naught. So he removed from that
place to another and threw again, but once more the net came up empty. And he
went on removing from place to place till he had gone half a day's journey from
the city, ever casting the net, which kept bringing up naught. So he said to
himself, "By Allah, I will throw my net a-stream but this once more,
whether ill come of it or weal!"
Then
he hurled the net with all his force, of the excess of his wrath, and the purse
with the hundred dinars flew out of his collar pocket and, lighting in
midstream, was carried away by the strong current. Whereupon he threw down the
net, and doffing his clothes, left them on the bank and plunged into the water
after the purse. He dived for it nigh a hundred times, till his strength was
exhausted and he came up for sheer fatigue, without chancing on it. When he
despaired of finding the purse, he returned to the shore, where he saw nothing
but staff, net, and basket and sought for his clothes but could light on no
trace of them. So he said in himself: "O vilest of those wherefor was made
the byword: 'The pilgrimage is not perfected save by copulation with the
camel!"' Then he wrapped the net about him, and taking staff in one hand
and basket in other, went trotting about like a camel in rut, running right and
left and backward and forward, disheveled and dusty, as he were a rebel Marid
let loose from Solomon's prison.
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